The other week I went to see Star Trek: Into Darkness. It was pretty good, I thought. Action! Explosions! Space! And of course we had a lively post-movie dissection during the car ride home, which started with something totally innocuous about the Klingon language and quickly swung to things like pon farr (Pon farr! Pon too farr? Pon not-farr-enough?)
My main takeaway from the movie, though, wasn’t actually about the Star Trek universe at all. My main takeaway was that actor Benedict Cumberbatch has – to my ear, at least – the MOST ENGLISH-SOUNDING NAME, EVER.
Seriously. I mean, Benedict Cumberbatch? The gravitas levels alone are over 9000. And then, because I evidently have some deep-seated wish to be in a Broadway musical, my brain started supplying rhymes.
Be-ne-dict Cum-ber-batch.
Benedict Cumberbatch. Found him in a cabbage patch.
The next thing I knew, I was straight up singing about the mythical origins of Mr. Cumberbatch.
I don’t even know, you guys.
nobody poops but you 